Hunter Biden has released an independent accounting of the turbulent launch of $LAPTOP, the memecoin he helped introduce last month, disclosing that the token climbed from almost $0.05 to $317 in less than two minutes before collapsing nearly 98% within a single hour.

A month ago we launched $LAPTOP. Within minutes, we had a chart that looked like every celebrity rug ever. Completely broken. I promised you a full independent accounting. Here it is. 1/

— Hunter Biden (@HunterBiden) October 7, 2026

The thread, posted on October 7, 2026, came roughly one month after the token's debut and fulfilled a promise Biden made to explain what went wrong on launch day. According to the report, the extraordinary price swing stemmed from serious liquidity issues and market making activity — not from the sale of the founders' allocation. Biden said he brought the forensics firm Groom Lake on board because he knew there would be skepticism and wanted launch day to be reviewed by an independent group. Third-party forensic reviews have become a routine way for token teams to address post-launch controversy, since self-published explanations rarely settle questions about who profited and how.

$LAPTOP Jumped More Than 600,000% Before Collapsing

Biden claims that liquidity for $LAPTOP was extremely thin at the outset. One of the markets reportedly had $500,000 for the launch but only $5,200 in its liquidity pool. Initially, around 0.003% of the total supply — less than30,000 tokens — was available in the pool.

According to Biden, that imbalance led to extremely volatile performance even on trades of small size. He said a $6 order firming the market would have had the same impact on the price as about $7,400 in selling. That behavior is a mechanical feature of thinly capitalized pools: the displayed price reflects only the ratio of tokens to collateral in the pool, so a headline figure can print on trivial volume even though almost none of the supply can actually be sold at that level.

In its review, Groom Lake benchmarked the launch against 668 other token offerings and determined that $LAPTOP's debut was comparable in no way to the others. The outcome was a pricing deluge in which $LAPTOP rallied from $0.05 to $317 in about two minutes, then fell nearly 98% within an hour.

Liquidity Was Pulled 84 Seconds After the Peak

The report's most critical finding concerns the moments just after the token hit its high. Biden stated that Market Maker 1 pulled liquidity 84 seconds after the peak, causing liquidity near the market price to drop from around $16,157 to zero. That meant traders who wanted to sell their tokens had no choice but to accept rates far below the previously quoted market price in order to exit their positions. The review refers to the two firms only as Market Maker 1 and Market Maker 2.

The review shows that Market Maker 1 closed roughly $686,000 in profit through positions held on decentralized exchanges, while trades associated with Market Maker 2 generated more than $2.1 million in net profits. Biden indicated that the problems with the launch should be attributed to a market maker that was able to repurchase tokens and burn them. Because the report leaves both firms unnamed, its profit figures cannot be checked against the counterparties themselves.

Founder Tokens Remain Locked

Biden dismissed allegations that the launch was an "OWGA." He also stated that all founder allocations remain in a single wallet and have not been moved since the launch, and that they carry a six-month lockup followed by a two-year vesting period. Lockup-and-vesting schedules of this kind are a standard way for token teams to signal that insiders cannot exit into early demand, though their assurance lasts only as long as the schedule itself.

Token Burn Planned After Failed Launch

Despite the failure, Biden indicated that he will not end the project. The team plans to burn 90% of the initial airdrop tokens, an amount equal to 10% of the total supply. That burn will be followed by the team's ongoing publication of data related to the launch. How the burn executes on chain, what the continued data releases contain, and whether the two market makers behind the reported profits are ever identified are the concrete markers by which the project's accounting will be judged.

The episode illustrates how a memecoin can display an enormous headline valuation while having too little real liquidity for traders to exit anywhere near the quoted market price.

Source: CryptoNinjas